Nicknames are everywhere, and rather than choose them for ourselves, it is something we are given. Mine for example, is ‘The Chosen One’ or ‘God’ – which is really embarrassing.
Concerning footballers however – they derive from the dressing room, the fans and maybe even the commentators in a rage of verbal diarrhoea. Below is a list of our top ten nicknames, and where their origins lie.
10. Jonathan Woodgate – ‘Village’. This is a nickname which is completely obvious when watching any post-match interviews, or even looking at his hairstyle. Woodgate was called ‘Village’ for his similarities to the Village Idiot, and came during his days at Leeds.
9. Ray Parlour– ‘The Romford Pele’. Parlour was tagged as the Romford Pele by Marc Overmars and rose through the baptism of fire to become a legend in football and Romford alike.
8. Duncan Ferguson – ‘Disorderly’. I’ll give you a clue as to why he got this nickname – it’s not because of his lack of organisation. Ferguson is the only player I know to have been imprisoned for his actions on the pitch, and gets his nickname for the three times he’s been arrested for being drunk and DISORDERLY – get it?
7. Fitz Hall – ‘One Size’. Great pun for an average Championship player. Credit goes to the one (and probably only) fan in the Oldham stands who came up with it.
6. Gary Doherty – ‘The Ginger Pele’. Any Tottenham fans remember this red headed legend gracing the pitch? Well, he was called ‘Ginger Pele’ because if you squint at the telly when he’s on the ball, it looks a little like… Ron Weasley in a P.E lesson. Sorry Gary, ginger – yes, Pele – no.
5. Richard Wright – ‘Richard Wrong’. Classic nickname for this guys antics between the posts – in other words, he was a rubbish keeper.
4. Dennis Bergkamp – ‘The Non-Flying Dutchman’. One of the Premier Leagues most infamous strikers who hailed from Holland, and in his entire career he refused to get on an aeroplane. Two plus two and all that.
3. Nicolas Anelka – ‘The Incredible Sulk’. The guys a bint.
2. Jason McAteer – ‘Trigger’. To put it kindly, the former Blackburn and Liverpool man wasn’t the brightest tool in the box – in other words, he was dumb. He once asked to have his pizza cut into four pieces because he said he couldn’t manage it in eight pieces. The nickname shortly followed, deriving from the hopelessly adrift Only Fools and Horses character – Trigger.
1. Claude Makelele – ‘The Tripod’. Right, there’s no easy way to say this. Not only was he famous for his big tackles on the pitch, but also off the pitch. I’ll say nothing else, but I bet he looked like an anaconda in a tin of worms – you get the idea.
That concludes the round-up, but if you can think of any more then leave a comment below.
By Ashton Schorah
Twitter: @AshtonSchorah
